Hey, it’s “Star Wars Day” and I haven’t bitched about Star Wars yet!
Ok, I won’t complain too much. But imagine if Disney actually had a plan for Star Wars, instead of shitting the bed immediately by backing themselves into a corner with the setting of their sequel trilogy?
Let me get one thing out of the way right away; I don’t hate everything about the new films. I liked the performers and their performances. I liked the idea of most of the characters. I liked some concepts that were explored (and then ultimately discarded) in each film. There were some good things there… like bits of peanuts in a log of shit.
Most importantly, they are still better films than the prequels by FAR.
The Star Wars universe is vast and full of interesting opportunities for adventure. So what did they do? They re-made the first film and as a side effect to that negated any chance for interesting story telling between where the original trilogy left off and the new one picked up.
Nothing that happened in the original trilogy mattered. Despite a happy ending; they failed, a bigger-er and bader-er Empire showed up. The Jedi stayed dead. An evil Jedi master reigned supreme. Even before The Rise of Skywalker finished flushing Star Wars down the fucking toilet they had already set themselves up for narrative stagnation. How do you tell interesting stories setting up this new scenario? You don’t, because nothing of consequence will happen. Everyone fails. Luke fails. Leia fails. Han fails.
Here are two suggestions…
1. Set the sequels like 200 years after Return of the Jedi where some new threat emerges. Maybe Mark Hamill gets a cameo as a ghost or hologram or something. Chewbacca maybe is still alive and the son of R2-D2 and C-3P0 is the new hero’s traveling companion. Go far enough forward that the events of the original (*sigh* and prequel) trilogy can still be successful, but are no longer relevant. We’ll call this “The Next Generation Approach” (yes, I know TNG was only 70 years after the TOS films, be quiet)
PROS: You now have 200 years to explore in side stories and world building that can inform your new setting. The old stories are still there, untouched, loved, and available for dipping back into the well. Your new characters are forced to be unique and stand alone, since they can’t rely on older characters to bridge the gap.
CONS: You can’t milk the entire old cast for nostalgia purposes. You run the risk of alienating old fans who just want to see the exact same shit regurgitated back into their mouths like infant birds. However, in keeping with my TNG analogy, it was also rejected by some older fans at first, but then became the gold standard for Trek. Play it safe, minimal reward. Take a risk and sometimes you lose, but when you win, you win big.
2. Really plan the shit out. Start with a live action premium (i.e. cable/streaming) TV show that takes place a few years before your first movie. It sets up the new threat and what’s changed since ROTJ, but at a slower pace. Not in a title crawl… that didn’t really explain anything. Use this to establish some minor players in the upcoming trilogy. For the finale you need to have a big reveal… Luke or Leia show up. Get the audience PUMPED that they’ll soon see their favorite septuagenarian heroes back in action! Then release your first film that follows in the traditional Star Wars structure… the “Heroes Journey”. Between films more TV shows (could be a continuation of the same series or a new one) that expands on the universe and the minor players. When you’ve finished your trilogy you’ve laid the groundwork for a bunch of interesting tangents and at the same time given the audience “what they expect” via the movies.
From here you abandon this structure and take on a Marvel approach. Movies for new major players. Shows for minor events and world building. Major cross-over film events where the major players come together to deal with some bigger threat.
PROS: You set yourself up for tons of spinoffs and an endless conveyor belt of Star Wars trash. The OT characters are back, giving the old fans what they want.
CONS: Requires work, planning, and someone with a vision who fucking cares about Star Wars.
Armchair Screenwriter 